A Convicting Contradiction

Contradiction. The words carries such weight and negativity. I make a comment you contradict it. You say I am wrong. I disagree and respond to your contradiction with one of my own.

I am sitting here in Kushadasi nearby ancient Ephesus, getting ready to go out for one final day of work before I head back to base in Antalya. A few minutes ago, I was listening to the Aegean pounding on the rocks outside of my room and praying quietly, enjoying my moment in the morning.

Then began the contradiction...but it is not quiet as you might think...

For those of you not familiar with Islam, the call to prayer, broadcast by speaker from every mosque, rolls across the land every day. So, as I sat there praying, the call echoed across the water, bounced off the same rocks, and reached my ears. Two different beliefs, two different prayers rising in two totally different ways. A bit of a contradiction, but not the one that struck me like a blow to the face...no, this one has much more import and is much more convicting...

The call to prayer happens yet some simply ignore it. It is supposed to be a rallying cry, to call a people to prayer and worship and action, yet it is met by some with passivity and inaction. A contradiction.

And then came the convicting part...is this true in my life? At times have I become so used to the "norm" of my belief that I simply ignore it? At times have I met God's call or urging in my life with half-hearted enthusiasm, or passivity, or even inaction? Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not doubting myself horribly, just struck with the reality that I cannot be half-hearted, passive, or inactive.

A convicting contradiction.

My life cannot be directed by lip-service and good deeds. It is an affair of the heart, a rooted desire for the things of God that bubbles up from the deepest wellsprings of my spirit. Quiet simply, this belief, it is all or nothing. For if it is nothing...then why even bother to pretend?